I am an Osiris, a man waking in the night, listening to the varied voices of the stars. The gods speak through me and I am one of them. Yet, at times, they seem to shine so far away from me. Some days I push the plow, gather corn, make bread for the children, dig wells and wait for them to fill; and nothing of my life seems holy. It is only labour, sweat drying on sunburnt skin. I go on believing in miracles. I bend my back and lift heavy stones, legs trembling, and I strive to believe it when I say “I do the work of gods. The fields will be cleared. The temples will be built.” if I were an animal perhaps I could be happy, untortured by bitterness, unconfused by what I think.
I am learning to master thought, to do as I say I do, to say what I feel. I am not angry when I speak gentle words. I do do not beat the donkey and call myself beloved of the gods. Truly, I strive to carry the load without noticing the burden, to be on this hot earth a cool jug of water, to stand in the wind like sturdy sycamore branches, a place where birds rest, where the cattle gather, where sap rises, wherein earth and sky are home.
Normandi Ellis – Awakening Osiris